fearless

garlic, anchovies, cilantro: why i got it, what it means, and how it went

garlic, anchovies, cilantro: why i got it, what it means, and how it went

As soon as I’d finished taping the third season of “MasterChef” last year, I immediately knew I wanted to commemorate the whole experience with a tattoo. I recently unveiled a photo of my tattoo to the public via my Twitter and Facebook page, and many fans loved it, a few hated it, some wondered why I got such a huge tattoo for it being my first.

The truth is, it is not my first tattoo. My first tattoo was a Chinese character meaning “luck” which my good friend in high school paid for on my eighteenth birthday. Not because he wanted to give me something special, mind you, but because he thought it’d be worth paying $60 to see me cry out of pain. Unfortunately for him, I was smiling through most of it and even said I kind of liked the pain. In the end, he was left $60 lighter in the pocket and glumly disappointed by my non-tears.

While that tattoo was my first, it was indeed small (about the size of a half dollar). Fifteen years had passed since I was initiated into the inked club, and there were occasions when I wanted to get additional tattoos. My cousin and I were thinking of getting our last names tattooed on us in a Chinese character. But there really wasn’t anything outstanding or outlandish enough in my life for me to go get another one. I really didn’t think I’d be going under the needle ever again.

And then the show happened. And I became the MasterChef in the U.S. For 2012. And to be honest, even if I hadn’t taken home the title, I’d probably still get a tattoo simply because it was a life-changing experience. Tattoos, I believe, are not to be taken lightly. They’re permanent, for one. So it better not be something you’ll regret ten years down the road when your buddy asks you, “What’s the story behind the Hello Kitty on your bicep?” (Not to knock Hello Kitty—I think she’s cute. I just wouldn’t get her tattooed on me.)

So, yes, “MasterChef” was a life-changer. And as we wrapped filming, in the last couple of days we were all in L.A. Together, I was bouncing ideas off the others, asking whether: (a) I should get a tattoo, and (b) what should it even be of? Stacey, of course, gave me a resounding YES. And that it should be of the MC logo. (She ended up getting this tattoo herself.) Felix and Cindy said yes. Some said no way. And then there were two that said yes, but not of the logo. Which made me think and eventually agree.

So what should I get? After much thought, I decided to get a tattoo of a few of my favorite ingredients: garlic, anchovies (which represent fish sauce), and cilantro. In addition to being some of my favorite things to eat and with which to cook, they were food items I used quite frequently during the many MC challenges and thus served me well.

I also love the aesthetics of Japanese art and so knew I wanted these three key ingredients flowing together in some sort of Japanese print. How it would look exactly and how it would flow together would be left up to the artist because I, for one, had not a clue.

Since this was going to be permanent, I wanted to find a tattoo artist who was highly skilled with Japanese art. I considered flying to L.A. (Where there is a larger Japanese population than in Houston) to get it done. I even thought about waiting until my Japan trip to get it done overseas by a true Japanese artist. But everyone told me what I was thinking of getting would take multiple sessions, and in the end, I simply did not find it practical to take multiple trips on a plane to get a tattoo—it was already going to be expensive; I didn’t need to add several hundred bucks on top of that.

With the help of a few people I trust, I went from reputable studio to studio in Houston inquiring about the artists whom I’d heard could do Japanese art. I ended up choosing an artist named Tracy from Scorpion Studios in Houston. He was referred to me by John’s coworker, and after perusing his portfolio, my friend agreed he would be good for the job. As with most superb artists, Tracy was booked for months in advance (which I took as a good sign), and I had to write this strange email to him explaining to him that I was a contestant on a TV show and wanted to get my tattoo done before the series ended on TV, and that I wanted him to incorporate garlic, anchovies, and cilantro into a Japanese print.

Sure enough, it was the strangest request he’s had in a while, but being the amazing artist that he is, he came up with this tattoo which he freehanded on my back.

It is much larger than I’d originally wanted or anticipated, taking up a good portion of my lower right backside (instead of the 4”x6” I asked for). But Tracy said for the details and coloring I wanted, the tattoo would only look good if it was much larger. And so I acquiesced, figuring that I should leave the artist to his devices. After all, I know how irritating it can be to have someone come into my kitchen and telling me how to chop the onion.

“You pick the artist according to his skills and what you’ve seen of his work, and then you just have to let the artist create,” John told me. And this is true. And so that’s what I did.

I know I can’t see my tattoo, but I’ve been told by many people that it’s skillfully done and very unique. I guess even if it was terrible, it’s on a place on my body that is easily hidden and, being blind, I’d never see it anyway. (!) But I’m extremely happy with it. I have to give Tracy props for being able to take three food ingredients and working them into a harmonious flow all the while imposing a Japanese print look to it. On top of this, the art would have to look good with the curvature of a backside. Let’s just say the man knew what he was doing.

Many wonder if it hurt. To be honest, there were some parts that were more uncomfortable (e.g. When the needle passed over my spine or ribs or if he was doing some shading and had to go over a certain spot time and time again). My skin definitely felt tender for days after a session, and the aftermath hurts more than the actual needle time. But for the most part, it was not bad at all, just like how I’d remembered it when I got my first. In fact (and I know I’m weird), I kind of liked the buzzing pain sometimes. Call me a masochist—I survived “MasterChef” after all. The tattoo was supposed to take three sessions but because (in Tracy’s words) “I took that shit pretty good,” he was able to finish the entire thing in only two sessions of about 2.5 hours each. Because I was so still and silent, he’d kept asking me if I was okay or about to pass out. But I was fine. In fact, I was either dozing off or reading a novel in Braille.

I will likely get another tattoo after I publish my memoir a year or two from now. That will be another momentous occasion in my life that I will want to capture in ink. I don’t know what I’d want yet, but I’m thinking some sort of literary quote in an aesthetically pleasing font. What do you think? Any suggestions? DO you have any tattoos? What are they of, and what are the significances?

a “masterchef” season 3 promo clip with yours truly–season premiere less than a week away

*Update – Video has been taken down. :(

My bro-in-law posted this on my Facebook today. You would think I’m completely used to hearing myself on the small screen by now, but no, I am still horrified at the sound of my voice. This clip is funny, though, since it’s got all these dramatic camera angles and music. So crazy how editing can affect the consumer experience; it reinforces the importance of editing my own creative writing. (Ah, you like how I tied together the two passions of my life, food and literature?)

The third and most epic season yet of “MasterChef” premieres Monday and Tuesday, June 4 and 5, at 9/8 PM CDT on FOX. A witch, a pissing horse, a lollipop-sucking monkey–hot stuff…how can you resist?

watch me on “masterchef” season 3, premiering june 4 & 5

http://youtu.be/0C1ZOYtYmRI
I’ve been MIA for a while. But not to fear–I had good reason. I promise. During my hiatus, I was cooking my ass off to impress Gordon Ramsay, Graham Elliot, and Joe Bastianich. That’s right, I was cooking for my life to get on season three of the summer hit show “MasterChef” on FOX. After open casting calls in several cities across the U.S., I made it past tens of thousands of contestant hopefuls to land a slot in the top 100 to cook for the three notable judges. Did I impress them enough to get a white apron? Tune in to find out: “MasterChef” season 3 premieres June 4 and 5 on FOX at 9/8 Central. See what craziness ensues! In the meantime, here’s a promo commercial. And yes, that’s yours truly smack dab in the middle of it already crying like a buffoon. Hah!

caution: blind boarder

I don’t know what’s come over me. The older I get, the more daring I become. Or maybe the courage came with the vision loss, an illogical need to overly compensate to feel “normal”—“everything you can do, I can do too.”

Whatever the motivation, it has driven me to skydive two years ago and ski last year. My most recent adventure involves strapping both my feet to a board and skidding down an icy mountain. That’s right, I tried snowboarding last month. A bunch of friends decided to take a trip to Breckenridge again, and again, I called the BOEC to schedule boarding lessons. I was surprised to find that boarding came more naturally to me than skiing. I was less miserable this time and could even say I had fun. I was psyched to be able to go down the green and connect my turns a little from toe to heel by the second day. My teacher insisted that I was better than a lot of sighted beginning boarders. I think the key was the no fear factor—because I couldn’t see how steep a slope was or where the obstacles were, I just had to go with it and fully trust my instructor. I also think I had great instructors who, obviously, are highly trained. Thanks, BOEC, for helping people of all abilities enjoy the outdoors.

Here is a video John got of me snowboarding down the green with Wendy, my instructor. I’m slow as hell, but hey, I can say I carved on my very first trip! I hope this video inspires you—know that you can really do anything if you put your mind to it. Happy New Year, everyone!

blind mother wins marathon

My cousin, Pauline, recently sent me an online article about Amy McDonaugh, a legally blind woman from South Carolina who won the 13th annual Flying Pig Marathon in Cincinnati. She ran the 26.2 miles in 2:58:14, and this marks her first marathon win. Amy is a 34-year-old stay-at-home mom who has no peripheral vision, very poor vision in one eye and is blind in the other, but she ran the entire race without a guide. She can see straight-away; perhaps this helped her “focus” on the finish line.

Pauline noted that maybe next year, John and I can do the MS150 together, but with my tendency towards fatigue, I don’t quite see that happening. Instead, I’ll remain happily indoors blogging about all the great things other blind people do.

blind culinary student gets noticed by charlie trotter

This isn’t the newest of news but I recently came across the article for the second time and realized I hadn’t blogged about it the first time because, evidently, my blog hadn’t existed back then. Of course, that just wouldn’t do considering the fact that she is like the cornerstone for the entire reason my blog even exists!

Laura Martinez, a culinary student at Chicago’s Le Cordon Bleu, expressed concern with landing a proper job in a reputable kitchen after graduation because of her visual impairment. Last year, CBS featured her story on the Chicago evening news and arranged for her to meet Charlie Trotter whose same-named restaurant is one of Chicago’s top haute cuisines. The real kicker was when Trotter invited Martinez to work the kitchen in his flagship restaurant. But will she succeed in a kitchen full of sighted cooks? I don’t know but would be interested if anyone had the follow-up story.

  • Read more about and see videos of Laura Martinez, the blind culinary student, meeting Chicago’s Charlie Trotter.

    • I’m literate (for real this time)

    The last time I blogged about my Braille learning experience, I had just attended a little graduation ceremony which denoted that I finished grade one of Braille otherwise known as uncontracted Braille. Shortly thereafter, I was on my way to learning contracted Braille (grade two), and boy, is there a lot to learn (read: memorize) in contracted Braille! I finished the second book in my Braille program and borrowed a novel from the National Library Service in order to practice reading but I kept coming across symbols that I didn’t recognize. I called my Braille teacher, and it turned out there is a third book to the Braille series, and that he would have to special-order it for me. Apparently, there wasn’t a single copy in the office because nobody had gotten as far as the third book yet in this fairly new Braille method. I had to laugh: to think I am an overachieving nerd in all academic aspects of life.

    In contracted Braille, every letter not only stands for a word when written by itself, but there are also all other sorts of symbols that stand for groups of letters, e.g. “-ment,” “-sion,” “-tion,” “there,” “where,” and so on. It’s easily self-teachable since each subsequent lesson builds upon the previous lessons, but there are just so many darn things to memorize!

    I just got to the end of all my lessons recently, and it felt really good. It seems like all I want to do lately is read Braille. I guess I really do love reading. I missed it, and I didn’t even know it until I started doing it again. Braille is something one has to practice daily or else lose it very quickly. Now I’m on to attempting The Accidental Tourist by Anne Tyler all in Braille. The novel comes in three four-inch binders. Wish me luck.

    3 girls with nmo conquer the disease and, ostensibly, the world

    When I first met Erin and Jenna and their husbands back at the first NMO Patient Day of 2010, we instantly clicked, and over dinner at an Italian eatery, the idea was born. It had started as a joke when my husband, John (who is a tech geek), mentioned that we should start a blog called the Three NMOs, a play off the “Three Amigos.” Well, the name may not have stuck but the blog idea sure did.

    And so I introduce to you our NMO Diaries blog, an online space where the three of us ambitious and [relatively] young girls show how we try to live life to the fullest in spite of the Devic’s dianosis. It’s sort of a “I am NMO woman; hear me roar!” type of attitude, and we welcome your readership. The cool thing about it is it will contain a lot of videos (read: vlog) since Erin and Jenna prefer to leave the written word to me. The other cool thing is the name behind the Blind Cook is revealed. (Yikes! Enjoy.

    caution: blind skier

    John loves the snowy mountains while I love the sunny beaches, which is why for each of our respective bachelor/bachelorette trips, we headed to our desired destination: John to Breckenridge and me to Miami. Now that we’re married, we try to appreciate the other’s preference for the outdoors. This meant I had to bundle up and face my most dreaded enemy: the cold.

    John fell in love with snowboarding after he went for the first time last year. Before his bachelor trip, he had never seen real snow in his life. Born and raised in Houston, the only kind of “snow” he’d seen was the southeast Texas kind: quick flurries that came about once a decade. But ever since he got a taste of the snow and mountains, he was hooked. And so this year, whether I liked it or not, he was going to plan a trip back to Colorado.

    Never in my lifetime did I think I was going to attempt snow sports again. My first ski trip occurred over 15 years ago. I went for only one day with my family. After two runs down the bunny slopes, my uncle assured me I was ready for the green (intermediate) trails. What the hell was he thinking? It took me 2.5 hours to get down those greens. Meanwhile, my cousin lapped me three times on the slopes, a pro at the tender age of six. I ripped a hole in my pants with the ski pole and at one point, even skied straight into the yellow caution tape that roped off the edge of the cliff. It was a horrible experience, and I never wanted to do it again, let alone do it blind.

    But that’s exactly what I attempted this time around. I decided it was something I should do not so much for my husband but for myself. I wanted to feel capable. It was something I had to prove to myself.

    The Breckenridge Outdoor Educational Center (BOEC) is a neat non-profit facility whose mission is to adapt recreational activities so that all (including those with special needs) can enjoy the outdoors. The instructors from their adaptive ski school are certified to teach and guide those that are blind or paralyzed. Originally, I was going to sign up for snowboarding, but the BOEC advised that boarding was an activity better done if I had 3+ days to spend on the slopes. Because our trip contained only two full days on the slopes, the BOEC folks suggested I try skiing first, that I’d see more success with skiing in only 48 hours. And so I listened to their better judgment and opted for skiing instead despite the nightmare experience I had a decade and a half earlier.

    The first half of the first day was spent feeling out what it was like to glide around with a ski on the bottom of my foot. First, I walked around on flat snow with a ski on my left foot only. Then just my right. Finally with both of them on my feet. Then I took the magic carpet/conveyor belt to the top of the bunny slope and practiced the wedge: the wider the wedge, the slower you go. Eventually, I learned to turn and make S’s in the snow. The afternoon was spent on the green trail at Breckenridge, and I actually made it down the entire green without falling! (See my skiing skills in the below video.) Granted I was going 1 mph, but still…I was so proud of myself.

    I went against my teacher’s advice the next day and tried to ski Keystone instead of sticking to Breckenridge where, as John says, the greens at Key were like the blues(one level higher than greens) at Breck. The trails were steeper, and I ended up cutting my full day lessons in half to just a morning session because I was utterly exhausted. Not only is the sport already tremendously tiring–your legs are working muscles they don’t normally work–but for me who is a beginner and blind at that, skiing made my entire body tense because I was trying so hard not to fall. In addition to that, the fact that I can’t see to focus on any one spot made me get motion sickness on both the lift and at the bottom of the mountain; whenever I’d stopped, my brain and body still felt like I was moving. Needless to say, concentrating so hard on not falling and not upchucking all over my teacher were enough for me to throw in the towel by lunchtime.

    I must say, though, that my instructor, Jeff, and his assisting intern, Brian, were awesome because I only fell twice in the 1.5 days I skied. They made my experience as awesome as it could be, considering I was a turtle on the slopes and had to wear a bright orange bib that said “BLIND SKIER.” At least I wasn’t tied to the end of a rope like a sled dog.

    A bonus to the Colorado trip was the reunion I had with Erin and Jenna, the two wonderful young women I met at the NMO Patient Day. In the three months that we’ve known each other, we’ve grown incredibly close, communicating either by phone or email every week, sharing the goings-on in our lives, our day-to-day routines combined with our NMO struggles. It was great to see them again and know that we were all hitting the slopes to prove something to ourselves: that in spite of the obstacles, we indeed can do it!

    The BOEC does more than skiing and boarding. During the summer, there are season-appropriate sports like whitewater rafting. Go here to learn more about the BOEC. And you also don’t have to go to Colorado to do adaptive skiing. There are schools all over the U.S. and Canada. Just google your destination along with “adaptive ski school,” and you should be able to find what you’re looking for. And remember, if the Blind can Do it, so can you.

    how to plan a wedding blind

    And I mean that in all sense of the word “blind.”

    A few weeks ago, one of my best friends, Joanna, got married. I was fortunate enough to return the favor of being a bridesmaid in her wedding as she was in mine. I saw her go through most of the wedding planning, and while their engagement period was a fractionof mine (8 vs. 12 months), it reminded me of how hectic the engagement period (thus, wedding planning period) can be. At the beginning of Jo’s and Danny’s, John (who had just exited the notorious engagement period) kept poking fun at Danny, saying it’s a painful rite of passage that every husband must go through. Sure enough, like all engagements, Jo’s and Danny’s were not without their share of bickering and tumultuous moments.

    John and I never fought as much in our time we’d known each other until those sweet 12 months between proposal and ceremony. Men and women are programmed to function so differently, and the differences were inherent in our personalities: I was on top of things at all times, liked to be ahead of the game, had a massive Excel spreadsheet for everything, was “efficient” with all tasks, was the only bride I knew who ever followed the “to do” checklist on the Knot website all the way to game day. I put “efficient” in quotations because I understand now in hindsight that while at times I thought I was being efficient by starting on certain tasks early, I often took a long time to accomplish these tasks. Being the perfectionist, I may not have always used my time wisely, spending more time and energy on things that probably could’ve been achieved in half the time with pretty much the same result.

    “Nobody will notice that anyway,” John would say. But of course, even though I (being the blind bride) wouldn’t notice, I would know.

    John, on the other hand, seemed to like to wait till the last possible minute to start a task (e.g. our wedding invitations). He didn’t fret over the details, took weeks to check things off the list. In the end, I just remember breathing a humongous sigh of relief after our ceremony, knowing that on my wedding day, other people I had appointed would be taking care of all the details for me, and that as long as everyone was still alive and relatively healthy and safe through the end of our reception, then it was a success. I saw Joanna go through the whole thing, the whole wedding planning and all the spectrum of emotions that go along with the wedding planning from anxiety to excitement to annoyances to full-out tears. No doubt wedding planning is stressful for any bride, nonetheless a blind one.

    Before I lost my eyesight, I was even more of a control freak than I already am. Yes, yes, I know. You find that incredibly hard to believe. But I was even more anal, even more of a perfectionist, wanting to do everything myself because, well, simply put, I just didn’t trust anybody else to do it. I liked being independent, and I deemed my own thoughts and opinions above others’. Then I lost my vision, and suddenly, I was thrown into the role of Depender. No longer could I drive myself, no longer could I see what things looked like without the aid of verbal descriptions, and even then, it was difficult. What it all taught me is that we–even the sighted people–cannot control everything in life. Sometimes, we just have to let go and let others handle it. And that’s exactly what I had to do with a lot of my wedding planning. I had to pick people I trusted (thanks, bridesmaids and house party!) who could make executive decisions for me. When we were gown shopping, I told them what I liked and didn’t like, and then I had to trust that they wouldn’t let me look ugly or stupid on my wedding day. Same thing went for hair, makeup, jewelry. Even things like cake decorations, flowers, ceremony and reception venues, bridesmaid attire, groom’s attire–all this I had to trust others like John, my bridesmaids and house party, my vendors to choose for me. In a strange way, it was liberating to plan the wedding as a blind person because I didn’t have to make a lot of decisions, deferring it to others whom I trusted. It seems as though the only decisions I really had to make were menu and music.

    So I think the important thing about wedding planning (and this goes for all people but especially the sight-impaired) is to let go. Let others take care of it. Surround yourself with and choose people whom you trust to be making executive decisions on your behalf. And since it is your wedding after all, you will want to play a part in the planning process, so don’t be afraid to ask others to explain to you the visual effects of things in detail. Make sure they’re patient with this, and be patient with yourself too. Don’t be quick to frustrate both others and yourself. Remember that in the end, it’ll all come together and be fun. Enjoy your day. And last but not least, laugh.

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